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What do patterns say about you?

It is said that patterns like numbers never lie. Why do we rely on patterns to tell us about someone or something? Are there good patterns and bad patterns? Patterns are said to be repetitive, frequent, and routine actions that occur, denoting a design or pathways often used to attain certain outcomes. We all have a way we do things, react, or respond to things. For example, a successful businessperson or student, follows specific patterns invariably to achieve desirable outcomes. Remembering that it is the moment, you become attached to something; that the pattern begins.

Patterns of business people

I recently had the fortune opportunity to interview Ralph Kilondu, a prominent and successful businessman, residing in the diaspora. He effectively runs various businesses ranging from transportation logistics, banking & investing, real estate and most recent farming. Ralph shared that he has been in business for over 20 years and attributes his success to specific patterns of behavior he has devotedly adhered to consistently. These include:

“There are always patterns in everything, there are patterns in books, there are patterns in human behavior, there are patterns in success, there are patterns for everything in life. You just need to pay attention to them.” - Jordan Beffort

Interestingly, research studies on successful and effective people such as Richard Branson, Oprah Winfrey and Stephen Covey among others, closely mirror with the business patterns Ralph ascribes to following. Adding that, one can always tweak the patterns listed as one’s business needs or circumstances change, as adaptability is key.

Patterns in matters of the heart

Even in love related matters, patterns do exist and depending on our personalities, experiences and dispositions, we all have our patterns of loving, seeking love or being in love. As to whether our love related habits are agreeable or questionable, it remains with the recipient’s response or reaction. Here is Freddie Gustavon, a successful Car dealer yet was forever chasing after women even though the love he gave was rarely reciprocated. To get love, he spent numerous sleepless nights scheming how he would win the hearts of different women he liked along in his life. Through his work he had access to the latest cars and used them to pick up ladies to hopefully impress them. He wasted so much time and money, sadly with nothing to show for all his attempts. At 48, he was still as single as a Pringle, and this began to bother him as well as affect other areas of his life, like work, his finances and personality. His mother and confidant became equally concerned, thus convinced him to seek help from a shrink. Through his interactions with the counselor, the following six patterns of dating behavior were identified as the reasons why women ghosted him or run as fast as they could away from him after a date or two:

• Made Moves on the Ladies too Fast ● Talked About His Exes None Stop

• Very Cheap (wanted to go Dutch on dates) ● Too Possessive & Needy

• Interviewed and grilled his dates, instead of talking normally and taking an interest in who the lady was as a person. • Too desperate, so eager to please and be seen as Mr. Nice Guy.

The counsellor advised him that he would need to modify these patterns of behavior to get successful at love. Are you like Freddie? Are your dates ghosting you soon after? Then maybe it’s time to borrow a leaf from Freddie’s counsellor, change your style for happier outcomes. Although, change is often easier said than done with dedication desirable results can be achieved. After counselling, Freddie tried to change his love patterns, but he really struggled with modifying his ways, evidently, it may take him some time. Research reveals that, people always revert to their old patterns, which can be problematic if it’s a bad habit. To change, is really where the challenge lies. Change shows the absence of doubt. You must diminish all doubts in the mind because the battlefield is the mind. If you want to be able to change, then you must visualize the new you.

Patterns of investors

Have you had consistent bad trading days. If you looked at your trading records, can you see a pattern. Of the 20 or so trading days in a month are you loosing 75% of the time? Are the profits you make insignificant compared to your losses. Has this been going on for a while? Isn’t it about time you changed the pattern of trading! Here are some recommended trading patterns suggested by expert investors, such as Benjamin Graham & Warren Buffett:

● Treat Trading like your own Business ● Get Educated in Trading the Market

• Only Risk what you can Afford to Lose ● Use a Trading Plan/Always use a Stop Loss

• Use Suitable Technology, like Smartphones ● Always Protect your Trading Capital

• Develop Sound Trading Methodology ● Be Patient and Understand the Market

• If Losses are huge, Reduce Trading & Re-strategize ● Set Realistic Expectations/Minus Emotions

It is also possible you have outgrown your current trading strategy and need to learn a newer pattern of trading. For those who have already become proficient in say, Options trading you may want to venture into Scalping. At PeteandPete Investors you may enroll for the Scalping Course by Rose Flower. She is patient, personable and candidly shares her trading experiences such as losses she has initially incurred trading. It was through these losses that she learnt her greatest lessons, re-invented herself and improved her game. Rose humorously admits following the aforesaid trading patterns by the likes of Warren Buffet and in the process, has become a success story. Now she shares her expertise, to help other novice investors perform better. The point is if what you have been doing is not working, do something about it that will provide you with positive outcomes. I like the saying, “if you do the same thing all the time, you will get the same results.” And a second favorite saying is “only fools don’t change their minds.” I hope both sayings resonate well with my readers, and you get to apply it as is needed.

Three ways to break a pattern

  1. Understand Yourself Better. It is crucial to understand why you resort to certain behaviors to modify them. If you do not unearth the root cause of your actions, then you could be doomed to repetitiously replicate them routinely. You must know yourself deeply, more than anyone else in the world does. And by understanding why, you do the things that you do, it will become easier to correct the areas that need it.

  2. Start A New Behavior. The best way to alter any improper behavior is to replace it with a new positive one. Negative patterns should never be replaced with another negative one. For happiness to blossom, it needs to be something positive. Numerous psychologists globally emphasize that it will take 76 days for a new behavior to reach the level of automaticity.

  3. Receive Support from Loved Ones. There are patterns and behaviors that are too hard to break alone. One will need the support of family and/or friends to help one towards achieving mental and physical well-being. Since no man is an island, everyone needs support from someone. The best kind of support is from those who love and sincerely care for you. They will encourage you on days you feel weak. The encouragement will help you to achieve optimal success

I hope you meditate on this as you enjoy the festivities.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

By Cyd Nzyoka, PhD

Cyd is an independent researcher, writer & HR consultant. She’s versatile, passionate about investing, taxes, teaching at the tertiary level, corporate training and dissertation coaching. She’s involved in writing on multicultural education, social justice and careers among other topics. You may read her works under IGI Global Publications. Cyd is a graduate of Capella University - School of business and technology. Email thoughts and comments to


This blog is written for educational and informational purposes only. By no means do any of its contents recommend, advocate or urge the buying, selling or holding of any financial instrument whatsoever. Trading and investing involves high levels of risk. The author expresses personal opinions and will not assume any responsibility whatsoever for the actions of the reader. They author may or may or may not have positions in Financial Instruments discussed in this blog. Future results can be dramatically different from the opinions expressed therein. Past performance does not guarantee future results. Reprints allowed for private reading only, for all else, please obtain permission.

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